Have you ever met my son Jack? The first thing people usually notice is his height. He stands over six feet tall. He wears glasses. He chews his fingernails a lot. He jumps around, as if he’s dancing to music only he can hear. The truth is, you don’t simply meet my son. You experience him. […]
Hi. My name is Carrie. I have five kids. My second son has autism. His name is Jack. People ask me what I find the hardest when it comes to raising a child with autism. Is it the repetitive behavior—the way he asks the same question 17,395 times, even when he already knows the answer? […]
Do you love him more? Come here, buddy. Sit beside me, and let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, there was a mama who had five ducklings. The ducklings were born all in a row—one right after the other. Boy. Boy. Boy. Girl. Boy. This mama, she assumed her ducklings would be […]
Let me tell you a story about a boy. This boy, he is like no other boy. Oh, he wants to be! He wants to be like you and me and everyone else. But he is not. Sometimes this makes him sad. Other times he doesn’t seem to care. It’s hard to know, really. Some […]
Hi. My name is Carrie. I have a son with autism. He is fifteen. His name is Jack. When you have a child with autism, your life is a delicate tightrope. Every day, you stand upon the thin wire, one foot balanced in front of the other, hoping for the smallest step forward. And on […]
Every morning, I make your bed. I pull the sheets up tight, and I arrange the red and blue striped comforter on top. I fold your weighted blanket and tuck it into the bottom of the mattress. It’s corduroy, your weighted blanket. You don’t like sleeping with it because it’s hot, but it’s a great […]
One night, I kissed you. And you kissed me. Then we got married. We had five kids. We bought a minivan. We got a dog. We discovered autism. Or autism discovered us. Either way. Neither way. Raising children is important. It is fast, and fiery, and special, and ordinary, and fun sometimes and not-so-fun other […]
Hi. My name is Carrie. I have five kids. My second son, Jack, is diagnosed with autism. I used to think the hardest part of autism was the day we got the actual diagnosis—the day I walked into the cold rain of a November afternoon, and attempted to zip my squirming toddler’s jacket. I was […]
Autism is a blue-pen diagnosis scrawled across white paper. Low executive functioning. Poor social skills. Obsessive-compulsive behavior. Severe anxiety. Autism is unpredictable. It is unusual, and unexpected. It is rigidity, tenacity, and ability, all rolled into one complicated mind. It is a father’s determination. This father, see, he hurts. Sure, […]
Five days ago, you left for a trip halfway around the world. It’s been five days since I’ve seen your face. Five days since I’ve insisted you comb your hair before you left for the bus. I almost knocked on your door this morning to remind you to get up for school. In the grocery […]