There are many doctors who tell us autism is a diagnosis—an incurable disorder with many challenges. They write big long articles about executive functioning and perseverative behavior and self-stimulation. They lecture about the way it can change a family, and destroy a marriage. They are right about this. At the same time, I know a […]
Have you ever met my son Jack? The first thing people usually notice is his height. He stands over six feet tall. He wears glasses. He chews his fingernails a lot. He jumps around, as if he’s dancing to music only he can hear. The truth is, you don’t simply meet my son. You experience him. […]
Hi. My name is Carrie. I have five kids. My second son has autism. His name is Jack. People ask me what I find the hardest when it comes to raising a child with autism. Is it the repetitive behavior—the way he asks the same question 17,395 times, even when he already knows the answer? […]
Do you love him more? Come here, buddy. Sit beside me, and let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, there was a mama who had five ducklings. The ducklings were born all in a row—one right after the other. Boy. Boy. Boy. Girl. Boy. This mama, she assumed her ducklings would be […]
Let me tell you a story about a boy. This boy, he is like no other boy. Oh, he wants to be! He wants to be like you and me and everyone else. But he is not. Sometimes this makes him sad. Other times he doesn’t seem to care. It’s hard to know, really. Some […]
Hi. My name is Carrie. I have a son with autism. He is fifteen. His name is Jack. When you have a child with autism, your life is a delicate tightrope. Every day, you stand upon the thin wire, one foot balanced in front of the other, hoping for the smallest step forward. And on […]
Every morning, I make your bed. I pull the sheets up tight, and I arrange the red and blue striped comforter on top. I fold your weighted blanket and tuck it into the bottom of the mattress. It’s corduroy, your weighted blanket. You don’t like sleeping with it because it’s hot, but it’s a great […]
For the brand-new dad with a tiny, squirming bundle, and a wife who seems to have lost her ever-loving mind. The very sight of you sparks rage in her eyes. You change the diapers wrong. You fold the burp cloths wrong. You stroll the stroller wrong. Breathe, tender father. She will […]
One night, I kissed you. And you kissed me. Then we got married. We had five kids. We bought a minivan. We got a dog. We discovered autism. Or autism discovered us. Either way. Neither way. Raising children is important. It is fast, and fiery, and special, and ordinary, and fun sometimes and not-so-fun other […]
Sometimes I wish everyone had the opportunity to raise a child like my son, Jack. Jack is fifteen. He is nearly six-foot, two inches tall. He wears a size thirteen shoe. Blue Nikes, in case you were wondering. He picks his cuticles until they bleed. He goes to a special school. He takes medicine every […]