I know I should have apologized today for my son Jack. I should have apologized for the way he didn’t answer when you asked him how old he is, or look up when you commented on his height. Still you packed our bags cheerfully—the new placemats and the scented candle. But I felt a tension […]
I have a son with autism. His name is Jack. He is seventeen. Every morning, I make Jack’s bed. I pull the sheets up tight. I smooth the blue plaid quilt and stack the pillows. I do it even though he is perfectly capable of doing it himself. I’m not even sure he notices, to […]
I had the son who bit the teacher. I had the son who couldn’t wait in line at the zoo, or sit through a meal in a restaurant, or play tag at recess. I had the son who slept fitfully and woke at dawn. I had the son people stared at in the grocery store. […]
Lately, when it comes to our son and his autism, we are not, as they say, on the same page. I mean, it’s not like we haven’t been here before. Typically I latch onto an idea—integrated preschool, music therapy—and you don’t say much. You nod your head and I take that as agreement. Except we aren’t […]
Can you tell? When you see me ordering coffee, or mailing a package, or paying for gas, can you tell I’m a mother? I have five kids, ranging in ages twelve to eighteen. I have teenagers and one tween, and each one of them is funny and interesting and smart. Still, I miss my little […]
My son Jack has autism. He is seventeen years old. This May, Jack will wear a cap and gown, and graduate from high school. Life alongside autism is like a thrilling rollercoaster ride—heart soaring one moment, a pit in your stomach the next. I am so proud of him I could burst. And yet I […]
My son Jack has autism. He is seventeen years old. Autism affects the way he eats, sleeps, thinks, and learns. He gets agitated if there’s too much static on the radio and he doesn’t like hugs and he hates the beach. When it comes to what causes autism, I’m pretty sure I have heard it […]
One night, I kissed you. And you kissed me. Then we got married. We had five kids. We bought a minivan. We got a dog. We discovered autism. Or autism discovered us. Either way. Neither way. Raising children is important. It is fast, and fiery, and special, and ordinary. It is fun sometimes and not-so-fun other times. […]
Can’t you be a normal kid? Have fun. Act silly. Blow bubbles in the springtime and chase waves in the ocean and jump into big piles of autumn leaves. Make friends. Go to birthday parties and sleepovers and camping trips. What if I can’t, he asked. Try harder, they answered. Try bigger. Try with everything […]
Can you tell me a little about the living arrangements? Sure, Mrs. Cariello! We have an entire house for students like him. Oh, okay. Does he have a meal plan? No, we have a kitchen here. We do keep locks on the refrigerator and the cabinets. Locks? Yes. They need to ask permission to eat. […]