3 Comments

  1. Merceda
    October 1, 2018 @ 12:01 pm

    lol Dear, dear Carrie. I would completely understand and laugh WITH dear Jack when he, in no uncertain terms, tells someone to stop throwing the f’ing food. Not only is that a good, universal sign, it sure gets his point across. My time in the car with my ASD daughter is filled with the same 2,983,465 questions … and that’s just in the first 10 minutes in the car. The same questions she asked last week, and the week before, and the ones before that. [sigh] But she’s talking, and I’m patiently answering, and I even switch up an answer even more ridiculous than ‘what does black mean’ to see if she’s paying attention or just mindlessly asking questions. She is. So when assisting cheer camp this past Saturday, I found another special needs kid and it helps me to understand, and I try to hep her in a way she understands. So keep writing. You’re helping!

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  2. GP
    October 1, 2018 @ 12:11 pm

    I used to feel that in certain situations, at a restaurant or other public places, I had to give folks a heads up very quietly, almost cryptically, and let them know in advance that my daughter was on the spectrum. I did not want anybody to be surprised by my daughter’s reactions or judge her for it.

    I am sorry now that I ever felt the need to be cryptic. After all, it’s nothing to be ashamed of, and there is really no need to be indirect. I also realized that I would never be able to teach my daughter how to self-advocate if I did not model it clearly and unabashedly.

    So, some time ago, I started to just tell the Hibachi chef (seems to be a common problem by the way…) to please not throw food into my daughter’s direction because it makes her very uncomfortable (and me, too, actually). Eventually, I would ask my daughter to give the chef a heads up on her own.

    We are trying to do the same in other situations (e.g. at other restaurants and even regarding certain situations at school). Sometimes it is hard for the teachers to understand that powering through discomfort full force without alternative will exacerbate anxiety and can cause PTSD. It is simply not true that forcing someone to “just put up” with discomfort will help a person to get over it.

    I am hoping to be able to help my daughter get to know herself really well so that she’ll be able to ask for what she needs in order to feel comfortable and do well. Learning to self-advocate is key. With lots of practice, I am confident we’ll get there.

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  3. Audrey Bueno
    October 2, 2018 @ 2:35 pm

    This article couldn”t have been more accurate and well written. You’ve been doing such an amazing job! I am a Brazilian mom of an Aspie child and I’m a psychologist and a translator, as well. I own a blog about Asperger’s, where I often share some translated materials, as there’s very liitle about it in Portuguese. Would you allow me to translate and share this post of yours (with all the proper indication to your blog, of course)? If so, let me know, please. You can reach me at: audreybueno@gmail.com
    My blog address is this one: https://sindromedeasperger.blog/
    Many thanks for all the special posts you’ve been sharing with us all.

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